OK OK, Pictures Finally

Finally, after many many requests for recent pictures, I have found the time to post some.
Things have gotten better, I have made it through the worst part of the post partum depression/panic attacks. I took off with Marissa to Ashland, KY for a few days and bonded with her and spent time with my family
there and it was great. I brought Josh back with me and he stayed for a week and
 it was great having him around. Ruben was all about Uncle Josh. 
I will post those pictures when 
I get them developed.





Posted by Kiesha 

Marissa Kaylee Dawn's Well Baby Checkup

We took Marissa to the doctor today. She is 23 inches long and weighs 10lbs 4oz. She has grown a lot in seven weeks. I will post her one month pictures this week, we took them last week but I have still not downloaded them.

Her thrush is getting better and her doctor is going to make an appointment for us in Nashville with a pediatric surgeon in the next few weeks. We want to get the surgeons opinion what if anything we need to do for the hole that's near her tracheae. There's is this long medical term for it but I don't remember what it is at the moment.

Things are getting a bit better. I have come out of my cave (our bedroom), and for those that think I'm kidding, just talk to my hubby. I'm even made trips out of the house with the kids. Not for long distances and I have not taken them out in public by myself yet either. Baby steps here, tiny baby steps. I do feel more connected to Marissa and can actually make it through a bottle feeding without wanting someone else to take her from me. Tomorrow is the first full day I will have both of them by myself all day. We tried that last Friday and let's just say Jose had to come home from work and I went back into my cave. I'm slowing coming out of the fog and panic and anxiety but they creep back in from time to time. Jose has been great about it which I will write about in my next post because he now has a title and a huge head to go along with that. So stay tuned and I will tell you all about that, some of you are even responsible for giving him such a big head!

The best part

Roo was overwhelmed with presents but his favorites were his Thomas the train steam engine and his battery powered ATV, from his Nana's. He calls it his AVT Car and he does so well on it. It's for ages up to 8 and goes a little too fast for my comfort when it's on high speed, but Dad lets him drive on high speed and he loves it. Ruben handles it really well and has so much fun, even in the cold :)

Christmas Eve Family Pics

Our little stocking stuffer

Yes, I realize this was cruel and unusual punishment but she was just so darn cute in the stocking!

Finally getting the tree up!

Having a live tree is a tradition that Jose and I started our first Christmas, one that he did long before me. However this year was a little hectic, we did not even get the tree up until a week or so before Christmas. So here is a pic of Ruben hanging decorations while mommy and daddy got caught smooching :)

Not just "Baby Blues"

I know everyone is waiting for Christmas pictures and they will be posted very soon. So much has been going on. Everyone thinks having a baby is this wonderful event and the mother should be overjoyed, which is true. Baby's, especially our Marissa (I'm just a little bias) is such a blessing and joy but there are other feelings that come along after having your bundle of joy. Emotions that you seem to have no control over and have no idea why in the world you would have them. Postpartum depression takes on many forms and has a wide spectrum, from baby blues to panic disorder and even psychosis. I haven't hit the psychosis part so I guess that is something to be thankful full. I will write later about my experience and post some links to articles on the subject. A couple that are friends with us are expecting their first child and it is very important to be informed about this and not feel guilt for having those feelings.
Well I will post more later , hope you can understand my ramblings.

Big brother watching after baby sister

Ruben has already designated himself his little sister's keeper. He has to know where she is at all times and as soon as he gets up he wants to know "where's my baby?" Every time he leaves the house or go to bed he has to give her a beso. It's just the sweetest thing and makes my heart melt every time I see him with her.

There have been a few times where he will want my attention and tell me to put his baby sister down. And the other day Deana was holding her and he told her to "put her down now, that's mommy's baby."

Kiesha Meets Marissa Kaylee For 1st Time

This is one of the favorite pictures of everyone that I have shown the entire collection of photos at the hospital. The photo captures the unbridled and raw joy Kiesha felt at first seeing lil Marissa Kaylee. I have to put the photo in a bit of a context.

When Ruben was born Kiesha was awake for the c-section, so she got to see Ruben soon after birth and she was happy and smiling. That is my favorite picture of Ruben's birth. The picture above is my favorite picture of Marissa's birth.

This time around the doctors at the hospital informed Kiesha that she would be completely under for the c-section and gall bladder surgery and that I could not take pictures in the OR. Well Kiesha was highly upset and emotional at the time. She worried that she would not be awake if something were wrong with lil Marissa.

After coming to consciousness in the recovery room no one would give her a status report on Marissa. So she was worried. Hence, when she first sees Marissa we were able to capture her reation on film. :)