Making Memories the Moments I Can

These days it's hard dealing with my medical issues and trying to make sure the kids have a normal life. I want to make memories with them and I don't want them to just remember that I was in bed all the time.

So I've made a promise to myself that I would continue to do all the holiday traditions that we have always done even if it means I'm in bed for the rest of the day or days.

Marissa was all about digging in the pumkins, while Roo would not get his hands dirty in any way.

Getting ready to carve the pumkins.

This Hug fest does not occur often.

The three of us in our pj's after Daddy lit the jack o laternes.

Soccer Season has Officially Began

And he's loving every minute of it. Marissa is very upset that she has to wait until Spring to play though.

Western KY State Fair

This was one of the only things that we do yearly with the kids that I was able to do this year. They had a blast. And there favorite ride was the worm, which I do not have pictures of but they rode it like 5 times. Also, Jose is not in any of the pictures. oops. Rissa also loved the animals.
You can click on the smaller pics to get a better look.

Rissa loved the Nemo Ride.

Ruben loved the car ride.

They both loved being in there with the rabbits.

Sunday Pictures

Surprisingly, we all got up and made it to Mass on time, and was able to snap a few pictures before we went.

My Promise to Myself for 2009

Well, first off I am home. I got in Sunday night. Deb has pneumonia but is slowly getting better. There is no change in her dad. It was very hard to leave but I had to get back.


Tonight I am overcome with so many emotions.

The year has started and I know of several people who have lost someone in the last week or so. My heart aches for all who have lost someone they love and cherish.

My best friend, Deb, and her family may soon have to spend 2009 learning how to live without a beloved husband, father, grandfather, friend and all around American Hero.

Deb's dad is hanging on but the family is going through so very much right now. They are grieving the man they knew and loved for so many years. If he makes it, he may never be the same.

We aren't promised tomorrow but we are promised that God will walk the journey of grief or whatever road we may have to go down, even if He has to carry us.

Grief is such a very hard road.

We all grieve.

Whether it's a childhood lost, the ending of a marriage, having to let go of a dream, or the death of a loved one.

I'm in no way comparing these.
While there is nothing that can compare to facing the finality of losing someone you love, the process of grief is the same.

I've been down the road of grief many times and my heart aches for those who are starting or continuing the journey of grief this year.

I am reminded every day to squeeze every bit of life out of every moment. I want everyone in my life to know how very much I love and appreciate them. I never want to have to face another casket with a list of things I wish I had said.

So my promise to myself for 2009 is to spend the year showing the people in my life how much I cherish them.

I mean really, how much time does it take to address a card and take it to the post office, to send an email, to buy and inexpensive gift, to give someone a hug or just simply say thank you.

I let so many opportunities pass me by this year, opportunities to show the people in my life how much they are loved and appreciated.

I let myself off the hook by saying, "Oh, well I'm just so busy, they will understand." What if they aren't around to understand, what if I don't get the chance again.

So this year, I will drop the excuses and do my best to take every chance I get and show people what they mean to me, because I don't want to be here next year with a list of things I wish I had said or done to someone who is no longer here.

I've been thinking...

...about a lot of things lately. I changed the title of the blog from The Quinonez Family to Enjoying Every Moment. I did this because that is what has been on my heart lately. I have been reading a lot of blogs of families who have went through so much loss. Families that have lost their babies after days or just hours of them coming into the world. While I have experienced so much loss in my life, I can not ever imagine losing a child. It has made me think about my mom and everything she has gone through when my sister died. Time has really not done that much to soften the blow of losing her first born. Yes, it's been 15 years but my mom has never been the same. I look at the pictures of my mom from just a few days before our accident then I look at the pictures after. She aged 10 years and has never looked or been the same.

I've been thinking about what enjoying every moment really means and realizing that I can never get this time back with my kids. I remember when Kim and I were kids, all we wanted to do was be teenagers and then all she wanted to do was turn 18. I wish we could go back so that I could enjoy every moment of that time with her. Because I didn't, I thought she would be here forever. My big sis, my protector, my best friend and worst enemy at times. For so many years all she wanted to do was turn 18, did she enjoy every moment before she hit her goal? I hope she did, but I know I didn't.

I didn't enjoy every moment when I was carefree and in college, living in the dorm and having fun. No I was too busy planning what I would do after I graduated. Now... well now I miss those days of staying up late and studying for a test. I miss Lometa and I taking off and driving with the radio turned up and laughing for hours.

I did not enjoy every moment when I moved to Los Angeles to be with Jose. I kept counting down and looking to the day we would move back to KY. Now...well now I miss it just being the two of us and then just the three of us in our one bedroom apartment in the middle of L.A. I missed home so much that I did not realize how great that time could have been.

The last year I have been longing to return to work and not enjoying every moment with my children. I've complained that I'm tired of the house work and tired of Marissa clinging to me so that I am unable to accomplish anything. That I'm tired of her destroying everything in the house and have gotten irritated with Ruben when he just wanted to play one more game. Mom has been so sick and we almost lost in August and I still have not been enjoying every moment I spend with her. You would think that after all the loss I have experienced in my life I would have learned by now how important it is to enjoy every moment and live life in the moment. I'm ashamed to say I haven't.

Lately, I've been thinking and God has been dealing with me. I have to start enjoying every moment because my children are growing up, my mom's health is declining and life is just passing me by. I'm just sitting around planning and wanting things to be different. Why, I'm not sure. Because when I really look at my life now and where it used to be. I have a wonderful life. I have a husband who was hand picked by God and sent to me, who works so that I can stay at home with the kids, and loves me when I don't deserve it. I have two healthy beautiful children who still love me even though I may lose it with them every now and then. I have two best friends who know all about me and love me anyways. A godson who is my heart and soul. I could go on and on but I won't. Ruben is standing here begging me to play with him and you know what....I am. Dishes are in the sink, dirty clothes piled in the hamper, toys dumped everywhere but I am determined that I am going to get my priorities in order and start enjoying EVERY MOMENT.